The Advent of the Maid Guy
by Japanese Teeth
Summary: Basically a Kamen No Maid Guy/Negima crossover.  Naeka encounters a certain character from the Negima world...
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1: Double Trouble**

Naeka was on her way home from school when it happened. Everything had been going more or less normally. Or at least as normal as it did with Kogarashi around. But he had gone off somewhere else; probably to torment Fubuki in some way. For once Naeka almost wished he was around.

A giant worm had burst out of the street. Sitting astride it was a large, faceless figure. At first she had thought it was Kogarashi. It really wouldn't be that unusual for him to pull something like this. But it wasn't Kogarashi, and the prospect that anyone else was capable of this kind of thing terrified her.

She tried to sprint down the street, but it was too late. The giant worm had encircled her. The head lowered toward her, and Naeka actually had a view of of the person who directed it. Or his clothes, at least. The only hole in the guy's suit was a narrow strip between the top of the collar and the bottom of the hat. The only thing visible was a pair of leering eyes.

Naeka drew her katana. She had started carrying it to school with her shortly after Kogarashi had moved in. She hoped that it worked a little better on giant worms. She yelled up at the figure on the worm.

"What do you want, you bastard!"

The voice that answered her sounded mechanical and artificial.

"Boobies!"

The blood drained from Naeka's face. This was like any of the dozen Breast Fanclub fiascoes, only about fifteen times worse. She looked down at her ample chest and groaned. "Damn it!" Stupid boobs caused more trouble than they were worth. She looked back up at the worm-rider. "They're mine! You stay away from them!"

"I'm sorry, but that isn't an option." The worm screeched and suddenly a bunch of tentacles shot out of its mouth. Naeka barely dodged out of the way, whipping the katana around to slice through several of the tentacles. The worm started to coil up. She didn't have much dodging room left. The tentacles shot at her again. This time one caught her around the ankle.

The worm started to reel its tentacle back in. Naeka dropped the katana as she was flipped upside down. Before long she was dangling in the air in front of the worm-rider. He now stood on the ground watching intently. She could hear him laughing. Then she felt something long, thin, and a little slimy snaking across her body.

"Huh? What the...Hey! Don't do that!" Another tentacle was caressing her chest. There was a popping sound as the tentacle wrenched the front of her shirt open. "What the hell!"

The large figure was cackling and wringing his hands in expectation. The worm started jerking Naeka up and down. She could feel the worm-rider's eyes staring at her breasts as they bounced. After a few seconds, the worm began to lower her. She found herself hanging directly in front of the strange man. He cracked his fingers and began wiggling them. He started to reach out towards her chest.

Then they heard it. It echoed out of the hole that the worm had left behind. It was a sound that Naeka had never thought that she'd be glad to hear.

"**Kukuku**."

* * *

I'm well aware that anyone who's familiar with the _Negima_ manga can probably see what's going to happen next time from miles away, but whatever.

I have no idea what inspired me to write this. It's just a stupid idea I decided to write in between all my other stuff.

The next chapter will finish up the story (at least that's the plan).


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2: It Gets Worse (or Better)**

The tentacles released Naeka and the worm turned toward the sound of the laugh. There was an explosion of dirt and shattered asphalt as Kogarashi burst from the ground. Naeka sprinted away and hid herself behind a tree. No way was she going to get caught in the Maid Guy's line of fire. She peeked out from her hiding place.

The worm lunged at Kogarashi, who easily jumped over it, landing near its tail. He wrapped his arms around the end of the worm.

"MEIDO GUY SUPEREKESU!" Naeka watched in horror as he lifted the worm from the ground and whipped it over his head, bringing it crashing down into the street. She could feel the ground shake. The worm twitched for a few seconds and then was still. Kogarashi brushed his hands off and turned to the person who had been controlling the worm.

"You think to come between me and boobies! Have at you!" The mysterious man charged headlong at the Maid Guy. Kogarashi grinned evilly as the assailant approached.

"MEIDO GUY PIMPU SURAPU!" He whipped his arm around, the back of his hand smashing into his opponent, who landed a good forty feet back. Kogarashi folded his arms. "Kukuku. Fool. It is my job to protect master's breasts!" He looked at the tree behind which Naeka was still hiding. "Now I must check to make sure that master's breasts are unharmed." He made a beeline for the tree.

Naeka braced herself for the worst. As Kogarashi came around the tree, he was stopped dead in his tracks by a nail bat to the face. Fubuki stuck her head out from the other side of the tree. "Sorry about that." She took Kogarashi by the leg and started dragging him back towards the house. "He was making dinner and then suddenly flew out the window. Took me a while to figure out where he went."

"Uh, thanks." Naeka scratched her head. "I'll see you back at the house." She walked over to where the worm had grabbed her to retrieve her backpack and katana from the ground where she had dropped them, as she straightened up, she felt a strange sensation in her chest. She looked down to see a pair of small, tanned hands feeling her up. A voice came from behind her.

"Very nice. Very very nice! You rarely find boobies of this size that retain their perkiness! And perfectly firm while still retaining their beautiful squishiness! Truly amazing! I'll have to give these an 89!" Naeka wrenched herself free and turned to see a short, tan, blond girl standing behind her.

"What the hell are you doing?" She swung her backpack at the strange girl, but she was gone.

"Aaahh!" Naeka turned towards the scream to see the girl doing the same thing to Fubuki.

"What a marvelous shape! So supple and firm. And the perfect size for you! Just the right amount of bounce without the sagging. Truly exquisite! 92!" Fubuki finally wriggled out of the girl's grip, clutching her chest to protect it against further groping.

"Who are you!"

The girl folded her arms. "I am the Chichigami, a connoisseur of all boobies!" She gestured towards Fubuki and Naeka. "You possess some of the finest that I have seen since I came from the other world. You ought to be proud!"

Naeka stared at her incredulously. "Right... Really, these things are more trouble than their worth."

"Never say that!" The Chichigami hopped on top of a nearby pile of rubble and struck a dramatic pose. "Breasts as wonderful as yours are a gift! You should never be ashamed of them. Care for them, cherish them, and you will see just how great of a blessing they are!" She pulled two packets out of her pockets and tossed them down to Naeka and Fubuki. "My gift to you! Never neglect to treasure your boobies! Until we meet again." She waved, jumped into the hole left by the giant worm, and was gone.

Naeka and Fubuki stared for a minute before looking at the packages the Chichigami had thrown them. Specialized bras. _Guaranteed to keep your boobies healthy._ Naeka turned to her maid.

"What just happened?"

"I'm...not sure." She shrugged. "Let's get back to the house so I can finish dinner. Kousuke gets ornery when he's hungry."

Naeka took hold of Kogarashi's other leg, and they began dragging him down the street back towards the house. "Wait a minute..." Naeka stopped. "She gave you a higher score!"

Fubuki dropped Kogarashi's leg and started to walk quickly down the street.

"Hey come back here!" Naeka chased after her. "I want to see just why your boobs are so much better!"

* * *

what is this i dont even

So, yeah. That finished up this story. Really no point to it other than I was bored, and weird things happen when I'm bored.


End file.
